theoriginalspike: innumerablegibbons: A woman got breast implants made of wood yesterday It would be funny if this joke had a punchline Wooden tit
beerito: “are u crying?” “no I just have swag in my eye”
peregr1ne: my mom is trying to pick a colour for her new wheelchair and me and my dad are telling her to get black and she’s just like “but how will I know if someone is stealing it” and my dad is just like “because you’ll be sitting on the floor” and she slapped him
slenclerman: yes friends let us blaze the marijuana! four hundred and twenty haha
schlgrl: tell me i look cute with your cum on my face (✿◕‿◕)
harryedward: i’m friends with everyone until they get better friends and kinda leave me
''Are you free tomorrow?'' No, I'm expensive.
i cant sleep but im sleepy do you see my fuckin problem